May 2nd, 2009

Quickie Before Dinner

Walt Disney World Diversional Extravaganza — Installment 4

Earlier in the week we went on the Aerosmith-themed Rock ‘n’ Roller Coaster at Hollywood Studios. We’ve gone on a few roller coasters here of course, and I’ve been on some in my life, but this might be the most “roller coastery” roller coaster I’ve ever been on. This was a motherfucking roller coaster. There was no slowness. At all. Not at the start, none in the middle. There was no slowly going up the hill to plunge down. The safety shoulder harnesses got lowered, ride attendants came by to check them — and we shot off like a bullet. And I didn’t breathe for the next few seconds. Not because I felt scared and was holding my breath, but because the ride literally took my breath away for a few seconds. From the first second it shot straight down the track, then up, then down, then around, at approximately Mach 3.

Today we went back again and rode it three times. Many of the rides take pictures of the riders at some point. I mentioned to Rick on Big Thunder Mountain Railroad yesterday (also ridden three times) that it would be cool if we had it together enough on one of these rides to kiss at the time our picture was taken. He pointed out that we would have to know where the respective camera was, which we don’t, and suggested we just start making out on them in general to increase the chances of getting the right shot. He had pointed out earlier that in the list of “Do Not Do This” that they announce before most rides, “have sex” is not on it. Of course, kissing during the Rock and Roller Coaster would not only have been seemingly rather unwise but also physically impossible due to the prominent safety restraints.

The Ellen Degeneres Energy Ride at EPCOT, however, involves riding in a vehicle of long bench rows. When Rick and I rode it Thursday we ended up seated in a row by ourselves with only one other group of other people several rows back. The ride takes place mostly in the dark. Thus it occurred to me this was a magnificent setting for a surreptitious blowjob. Just as I realized and started to become excited about this, a group of latecomers straggled in and sat in the row right behind us. Hmph. Admittedly, WDW does not seem ideally designed or contextualized for public sex — but we haven’t given up yet.

Ah well — we may not have gotten very far in the public area, but the pirate room has not been going to waste. ;)

At the Magic Kingdom yesterday I noticed something I don’t remember happening when I was here as a kid. I’ve seen a number of girls dressed up in particular Disney character dresses — Cinderella, Beauty, etc. I love these dresses, as they’re shiny and glittery and often accompanied by a hairstyle that includes glitter. I wish they would sell them in adult sizes. Granted, I dress like that all the time anyway, but I still feel it would be delightful to have a glittery bright yellow Beauty ball gown to wear around the Magic Kingdom.

However, I do already have my own Disney costume, and it is “adult” in more ways than just its size. Somebody I know is a big fan of Alice in Wonderland and has more than a bit of an Alice fetish (I’ll give you a hint — I’m sharing a hotel room with him). Today is Rick’s birthday, and while he has seen my Alice costume, he doesn’t know that I brought it with me or that I will be wearing it for him later tonight after we get back from dinner. Speaking of, I’m banking that he won’t read this before he is privy to this surprise since he’s finishing getting ready for dinner now and we’ll likely be leaving right after I post this.

If I thought I could get away with it, I’d wear my Alice dress to dinner. Since I would not get away with it, I will save it for our return, whereupon Alice will meet the wonder of Pirateland. ;)


“Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Rick Write, happy birthday to you…”

6 Responses “Quickie Before Dinner”

  1. Erobintica says:

    OOooo! Happy Birthday two days in a row!

  2. Marina says:

    Ooh Rick, Happy Birthday! Enjoy your trip to wonderland!

  3. They really should build a Public Sex theme park, now that Pleasure Island is gone.

  4. Rick "Boutros Boutros" Write says:

    Yay! Thanks!

    A public sex theme park might be cool, but also might be a bit creepy. I’m already a bit nervous when climbing in a roller coaster after random sticky teenagers… I imagine it’d be kinda oogy to play “Guess What Fluid Is On the Seat”.

    Although… a “Whores From Around the World Showcase” sound neato!

  5. Emerald says:

    Ha! I think a Public Sex theme park sounds like a great idea — I was saying earlier this week that I wondered what it would be like if Walt Disney World designated one week out of the year “adults only.” I didn’t quite think that far ahead, but that seems like a delightful theme! Easy transition from Chip and Dale to Chippendales…

  6. I’m all hot and bothered about the Alice in Wonderland dress! I definitely noticed the popularity of princess dresses at Disneyland with some nostalgic regret they weren’t around in my younger days. I think you can buy an adult size at costume stores, or maybe hijack one of the characters and force her at lollipop point to trade clothes with you.

    I think the adult theme park is a great erotic story waiting to happen. Could even be an anthology all its own, lol.

    Anyway, Happy Birthday, Rick. Hope it was Wonderland-alicious!

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