Archive for February 9, 2011

February 9th, 2011

Recommended Reading #33: Self-Awareness



      “Compersion: Using Jealousy as a Path to Unconditional Love” by Dr. Deborah Taj Anapol (Sex and Spirituality, Non-Monogamy, Self-Examination) Undated

I loved this piece centered around a specific emotion—jealousy—and a way of perceiving (and practical application of) it that has seemed rarely offered in mainstream interpretation. This expansion of perspective—seeing something in a new way that has perhaps never occurred to us—appeals to me in and of itself. I also appreciate in this piece the invocation of going deeper than what we see as our fears, even of “worst-case scenarios,” to 1) see what they may be covering up, and 2) encounter a deeper understanding and place of dwelling that encompasses fear along with everything else rather than relegating it (fear) to the primary motivator and reacting to it, as we often unconsciously do.

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      “Every Time You Orgasm, An Angel Gets Its Wings” by Heidi Anderson (Sex and Culture, Abuse, Sexual Pleasure, Sex and Healing) 8/23/10

I haven’t yet read this piece without being brought to tears. I find what the author says, especially in the second half of the piece and in conclusion, so strikingly beautiful it’s hard to express. Ironically, while I interpret her as disclaiming spirituality (which certainly she has every right to do and I do not aim whatsoever to disregard or take away from her) in the piece, to me what she offers here practically epitomizes the understanding in me of our Essence/True Nature and universal connection, in ways both related to sexuality and in general. I include it under the subject “Self-Awareness” both because of its mention of owning one’s feelings if one feels uncomfortable in regard to overt sexuality, and also in the implicit connection I interpret it as expressing between one’s own sexual autonomy and authenticity and the health and healing of the world. Self-awareness seems integral in such a scenario to me (and beautifully demonstrated in this piece).

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      “Censorship and the Fear of Sexuality” by Dr. Marty Klein (Psychology, Public Policy, Sex and Culture, Self-Awareness) 3/1999

I see, and deeply appreciate, this article as an incisive, in-depth, so-very-needed exposition on censorship and how it relates to self-awareness and/or sexual repression—in other words, the psycho-social factors around the desire for sexual censorship as a public policy. To me, the offering to acknowledge the psychological aspects underlying such phenomena is so well-taken. It is something that seems crucial to me, and incidentally, such focus may invite us all to examine ourselves with more strength, depth, and love. As Dr. Klein states in the article, “We need to empower people to identify and deal with their fear of sexuality, and remind them of their inner resources. . . . [T]he more we can help these people acknowledge their personal pain, the easier it will be for them to listen, and to see that their comfort lies in personal solutions rather than public policy ones.” This perspective underlies everything I feel and embrace as an advocate for authentic human sexuality.

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Recommended Reading posted every Wednesday