November 2nd, 2011

Recommended Reading #71: Pleasure and Consent



      “If She’s Not Having Fun You Have To Stop” by Thomas at the “Yes Means Yes” blog (Parenting, Relationship, Education) 10/29/09

I love this delineation of teaching about consent at almost any age–especially since it doesn’t even involve any discomfort for those who feel such at the idea of speaking to their children about sex. As the author points out, the message itself is not about sex at all but has obvious implications for consent, bodily integrity, autonomy, and respectful partnership, which seems to me of obvious import for everybody.

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      “Birds, Bees, Consent” by Julie Gillis (Youth, Sex Education, Parenting) 9/28/11

The topic of consent (“enthusiastic consent,” as the author puts it) seems of utmost and obvious importance to me in discussions and interactions around sexuality. As the author points out, it has seemed pretty infrequently mentioned or expounded upon in many (if not most) sex education contexts for youth I know of. I appreciate the author’s consideration of the subject as a parent and her exploration of how to approach the topic with her (eventually) adolescent children. Recognizing that young people are sexual beings and will eventually be responsible for their sexual perspectives and behavior seems a place to start—and one of which this culture seems to me woefully avoidant. Which, it seems to me, makes consideration like this on the part of parents and sex educators seem all the more welcome and essential.

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      “‘Because It Feels Good’: The Starting Point for Talking to Kids About Sex” by Hugo Schwyzer (Youth, Parenting, Sex Education, Psychology, Sociology, Sex and Culture) 7/22/11

I adore the framing I see in this piece. While I agree entirely, I don’t know that it had occurred to me so succinctly and straightforwardly to frame sexual education and understanding this way for youth. But the point Hugo makes about the body’s response and knowing when to do what makes so much sense to me. His offering seems well placed for parents and other educators in conversation with youth about sexuality.

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Recommended Reading posted every Wednesday

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