Archive for July, 2012

July 25th, 2012

Recommended Reading #109: Responding to Discord



      “Sex Work Snobbery” by Charlotte Shane (Sex Work, Sex and Culture, Self-Awareness) 10/13/11

While often when I’ve considered stereotypes in regard to sex work, I’ve been considering them from mainstream society/non-sex-workers, I have found it true in my experience and observation that a lamentable tendency toward what the author terms “sex work snobbery” has existed throughout the industry. I have not always observed it, of course, but I have seen signs of it and found it disheartening. I agree with the author that the tendency is neither helpful nor appropriate; society tends to marginalize the industry as a whole, and feeling a need to “elevate” ourselves to some higher level in the way this piece describes inherently (even if we don’t intend to or realize we’re doing it) degrades someone else’s line of work or professional methodology. I appreciate the author’s plea that it would seem helpful for this propensity to cease.

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      “The missing stair.” by Cliff Pervocracy (Conflict, Psychology, Sociology, Self-Awareness) 6/22/12

I find this well-put, and the idea of recognizance, especially in the context of recognizing that someone’s actions are that person’s responsibility and that it is not up to others to simply accommodate it in order to avoid conflict or upset, is one that seems of profound importance to me.

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      “The best response we’ve heard to Daniel Tosh’s ‘misquoted’ rape jokes” by Curtis Luciani (Abuse, Sociology, Perspective) 7/12/12

Beautiful and brilliant. The subject matter (that is, what this is a response to) is something I find so disheartening I frankly don’t even want to delve very far into any details of it, but I appreciate intensely this response—and especially the (what I find) impressive use of analogy. Well done.

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Recommended Reading posted every Wednesday

July 18th, 2012

Recommended Reading #108: Sexual Freedom, Pt. II



      “Vanilla Can Be Delicious” by Dr. Charlie Glickman (Sexual Preferences, Psychology, Sociology, Self-Awareness) 7/12/12

I couldn’t agree more with what I interpret Charlie as expressing here, and as usual, I appreciate seeing him express it so kindly and articulately. (I also love vanilla and agree that it is a complex, elegant, magical flavor!)

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      “I now support full marriage equality” by Louis J. Marinelli (Sex and Culture, Public Policy, Sexual Orientation) 4/7/11

I read this a while back, and it strikes me in a few ways. First, that the author’s perspective shifted such. While he explains the process in the piece, I frankly don’t feel I appreciate simply from reading it what such a process must have been like for him. Second, to acknowledge and retract one’s strongly-voiced (and -held) views to those close to us can be, in my experience, a deeply difficult move. To then express such publicly also seems, of course, potentially searingly challenging. I don’t know much about the author, and I don’t know his motivations, as he references. But what he says here strikes me as at the very least interesting, and to me it seems sincere. The lesson in stepping back once in a while and examining what we are doing, what we feel identified with and attached to, seems to me something we would all do well to consider sometimes.

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      “Anderson Cooper: ‘The Fact Is, I’m Gay.'” by Andrew Sullivan (Sexual Orientation, Humanity) 7/2/12

Adjectives that occurred to me to describe this piece as I read it: Complex, articulate, beautiful, profound, extraordinary. That about sums it up for me. I feel true gratitude not only to Anderson Cooper for sharing this, but also that there are those among us who express and embody this level of awareness, caring, and authenticity.

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Recommended Reading posted every Wednesday

July 11th, 2012

Recommended Reading #107: Autonomy



      “‘Feminism’ In Iceland: Saving Women From Their Own Adulthood” by Dr. Marty Klein (Sex Work, Public Policy, Sex and Culture) 12/6/10

While of course this all seems obvious to me, it sadly does not appear to seem universally obvious (or laws like the one referenced wouldn’t pass—or even be conceived). Thus, I can appreciate Dr. Klein’s elucidation that points out the things I find misguided and unacceptable about laws like this.

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      “The Last Taboo” by Sexquire (Economics, Labor, Psychology) 7/7/12

The framing of this strikes me as helpful and straightforward—I personally relate to what the author speaks of, and indeed the very area of money has generally felt uncomfrotable and avoidance-worthy to me. It also strikes me that, practically speaking, it has much to do with autonomy, and I appreciate the author’s offering such candid and self-affirming perspectives on financial compensation for one’s service.

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      “Of the validation of desire and the graceful acceptance of rejection: on male wanting” by Hugo Schwyzer (Sex and Culture, Self-Awareness, Interpersonal Relations, Gender Socialization) 10/21/10

I very much appreciate this piece. Its approach, as I interpret it, that addresses gender socialization; individuality and autonomy; personal openness, ownership, and responsibility; and self-awareness strikes me as incisive, observant, grounded, and relevant.

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Recommended Reading posted every Wednesday

July 4th, 2012

Recommended Reading #106: Examining Authority



      “Do you scare your kids? Do you think they deserve it?” by Jennifer Lehr (Non-sex-related, Parenting, Youth, Self-Awareness, Psychology) 5/8/12

This is one of the most brilliant things I’ve read in a while. So much so that it is still affecting my breathing as I write this (I just finished reading it). If more people realized, understood, embodied this, our world would change. Yes, I really do feel that way.

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      “There Is an ‘I’ in ‘TEAM’. People Are Just Too Blind To See It.” at PostHumorous.org (Non-sex-related, Workplace, Sociology) 6/22/12

This perception of corporate hierarchy and what I’ve perceived to be its general culture resonates with me, and I appreciate as well the brief mention of such a structure’s history—the point that industrial hierarchy was developed when jobs had a lot less to do with human contribution and individuality and more to do with performing a task comparable to that of a machine adds an interesting point to the general lament. Questioning corporate structure and hierarchy—as well as those characteristics in general society and in numerous other realms—seems to me a well-considered act, and I like this elucidation thereof.

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      “A Judge’s Plea for Pot” by Gustin L. Reichbach (Non-sex-related, Health and Body, U.S. Public Policy) 5/16/12

Given the myriad substances, synthetic and non, administered in medical care in this country and their known and unknown potential effects on the body, that a plant that grows in the fields where I grew up is somehow arbitrarily denied takes my breath away. Truly. I so appreciate this judge’s sharing and publishing this. I found his plea extraordinary and beautiful.

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Recommended Reading posted every Wednesday